Motherhood is hard. I’m now a mum of 3 and despite having been a mum for 5 years, I can assure you it doesn’t really get much easier; it just changes.

I think one of the most difficult things about motherhood is the isolation.

We are all driven by this urge to be the best mums that we can be, and along with that comes this fear of being judged. And if we’re honest with ourselves, we’ve all also got a competitive side, so we tend to share only the good stuff; the stuff that we want to celebrate and, yes, brag about!

So overall, we don’t tend to talk about the bad stuff; the stuff that isn’t working well, our struggles, and our experiences in trying to survive as mums. No wonder we feel isolated and think that we’re the only ones experiencing the “bad stuff” and so there MUST be something wrong with us/our child.

Well today, I’m going to be vulnerable and share some of my “bad stuff” in the hopes that it helps at least one of you to not feel so alone.

1. Sometimes I've gone days without a proper shower, and weeks without washing my hair. 

2. I’ve gotten so used to using the toilet with the door open, or with a kid either on me or staring at me while I go about my business.

3. I’ve driven around aimlessly to get them to fall asleep and stay asleep. Conversely, I’ve also avoided going out at all when they’re in the “I hate the car” phase, and I just stay at home and go stir-crazy.

4. If they fall asleep on me, I will stay stuck there until they wake, or for as long as I can, regardless of whether I need to eat or go to the toilet.

5. I’ve spent countless nights sleeping upright in bed as the only way I can get them to sleep soundly is if I hold them. I’ve also slept on the floor along their cots so I can pat them or hold their hand through the cot bars.

6. It’s not uncommon for me to cry in the shower, through the night, or in the car on the way to/from work when nobody can see/hear me.

7. There have been periods where I’ve hated weekends and public holidays because I only saw them as stressful, draining, and hectic.

8. There are many times when I’ve lost my cool, and even times when I’ve exploded into a psycho rage because I’d been keeping everything bottled up for too long. And once that’s over, I just feel guilty and sad, and like the worst mum in the world.

9. I don’t have a favourite child but there are moments where I struggle to love them equally.

10. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve felt like a failure as a mum. 

Motherhood IS hard. But we don’t need to make it harder. We are NOT alone.

Let’s normalise talking about the good AND the bad. Let's normalise having moments where we're just not loving motherhood. Let’s normalise being allowed to feel the entire range of emotions (sometimes in the same hour!) throughout our motherhood journey. And most importantly, let’s normalise being kind and supporting each other instead of judging one another!

Share this with a mum friend who you think needs to read this, and be sure to follow my account on Instagram for more snippets of my mum-life, and real, raw posts about my motherhood journey (and of course, all things caking)!